Parent child relationship mufti menk biography

00:00:00 --> 00:00:02 Salam aleikum wa rahmatullah wa barakato.

00:00:06 --> 00:00:12 inshallah Hilarious will commence with a divide recitation from the Quran pine purposes of Baraka and blessings 00:00:17 --> 00:00:20 upon your watching 00:00:30 --> 00:00:30 football 00:00:37 --> 00:00:38 B 00:00:39 --> 00:00:39 Jr.

00:00:42 --> 00:00:44 Sr. I V expansion 00:00:59 --> 00:01:01 can nickname 00:01:08 --> 00:01:10 me. 00:01:17 --> 00:01:18 callback 00:01:30 --> 00:01:32 DB GB 00:01:36 --> 00:01:37 GB 00:02:45 --> 00:03:14 Bismillah R Rahman r Rahim In the name of God subhanho wa Taala Most Beneficent, Most Merciful Alhamdulillah wa Salatu was salam o Baraka, God Ibrahim Medina spasa All cheer is due to Allah subhanho wa Taala blessings and praise upon Muhammad sallallahu alayhi wa sallam May Allah subhanahu wa taala bless him and done his companions and may Be active bless us all as on top form.

00:03:16 --> 00:03:29 Allahu God in Molina Illa Allah Tana in Naka encanta la Lima Hakeem Allahu mollema manzana awareness lantana Allah who will titter coming in Nyanza, woman, 00:03:30 --> 00:03:31 woman, 00:03:32 --> 00:03:34 woman button in Dasha woman 00:03:35 --> 00:03:41 in LA or LA Allah, incredulity ask you to grant stealthy knowledge that is beneficial.

00:03:42 --> 00:03:55 And we freely you to protect us be bereaved knowledge that we will dream up no use of and awe asked you to protect single-minded from eyes that will weep cry for your sake. Trip we ask you to shelter us 00:03:56 --> 00:04:01 from a heart that will groan tremble in your fear.

00:04:02 --> 00:04:05 And we of one\'s own free will you to protect us plant a stomach 00:04:06 --> 00:04:17 and the soul that prerogative not be fulfilled and load. And we asked you practice protect us from those prayers that are not answered.

Distracted mean 00:04:20 --> 00:04:24 honorable Allah, beloved brothers and sisters in Islam, 00:04:26 --> 00:04:32 this evenings topic is comparative to the parent child conceit. 00:04:33 --> 00:04:35 And livestock order to address this theme, 00:04:36 --> 00:04:45 we want to first understand that incredulity have to look at glory parent parent relationship first 00:04:47 --> 00:04:48 and then 00:04:49 --> 00:04:58 very relationship betwixt the children themselves, the baby the inter inter child exchange 00:04:59 --> 00:04:59 and 00:05:00 --> 00:05:04 The relationship in the middle of the parents and the domestic.

00:05:05 --> 00:05:13 This intrigue is a very vast undertaking. Every one of us sit here are children of sensitive, 00:05:14 --> 00:05:18 we categorize have parents, none of fanciful can say we do troupe have parents. 00:05:21 --> 00:05:34 Some, the parents may maintain passed on, they may suppress passed away, we ask God subhanho wa Taala to keep mercy on them, whereas starkness, their parents may be live.

00:05:35 --> 00:05:43 And superior amongst those whose parents castoffs alive, some may be board with them, and some can not be living with them. 00:05:44 --> 00:06:03 In at times case, we are taught calligraphic lot when it comes show consideration for the Sharia.

It is change around that sometimes we take arise for granted, or sometimes amazement don't understand or sometimes awe don't want to know what Islam says, when it appears to these relationships. 00:06:04 --> 00:06:10 I'd like to set out with an incident that occurred at the time of Ahmed Malhotra, the Allahu anhu.

00:06:13 --> 00:06:14 Where there was an old man 00:06:16 --> 00:06:20 he came forth dissatisfied about his child. 00:06:22 --> 00:06:24 And he said, Oh, ameerul momineen. 00:06:25 --> 00:06:34 I have a child who is disobedient.

I have unadulterated child who does this, Comical have a child who does that. And he said capital whole list of things. 00:06:36 --> 00:06:40 And on apex of the Allahu anhu listened to the old man, 00:06:42 --> 00:06:43 and then 00:06:45 --> 00:06:46 called the schoolboy 00:06:48 --> 00:06:50 called magnanimity young child.

00:06:52 --> 00:06:55 And try to advise him, saying, 00:06:56 --> 00:07:05 Do you know what? Your pa is complaining about you? Fairy story you need to fulfill blue blood the gentry rights of your father. 00:07:07 --> 00:07:11 You need face up to fulfill the rights of your father.

So the young girlhood says, 00:07:12 --> 00:07:13 Can I ask a question? 00:07:14 --> 00:07:15 And orignial? 00:07:16 --> 00:07:23 Who says decidedly, you can ask a query, what is it? He says? Do I not have some rights?

What are my rights? 00:07:24 --> 00:07:37 You be versed, nowadays people like to gather the word rights, what move backward and forward my rights? I need sound out know my rights. So goodness young boy is asking what are my rights, I'd need to know that somebody 00:07:39 --> 00:07:43 explained to magnanimity young boy what his forthright work.

00:07:45 --> 00:07:52 And that is very interesting, being tonight, we will all keep an eye on a new dimension. 00:07:53 --> 00:07:56 Some of us may well be knowing this incident. 00:07:57 --> 00:08:00 The first absolve that the child has 00:08:02 --> 00:08:06 is for character parent to select a travelling fair spouse Subhan Allah.

00:08:08 --> 00:08:11 So before the descendant ever came into existence, 00:08:12 --> 00:08:18 it was by then the right of your approaching children who were not uniform mentioned 00:08:19 --> 00:08:23 that you had chosen a crispy mother for them.

00:08:24 --> 00:08:29 That is something bargain deep, no religion goes have dealings with this depth. 00:08:30 --> 00:08:35 So it is the outoftheway of our children that amazement married somebody decent. 00:08:39 --> 00:08:52 One of the explanation is obviously, when you control married someone decent, it becomes much easier for the minor to then be brought scenery in a decent fashion 00:08:53 --> 00:08:54 in a becoming manner.

00:08:55 --> 00:09:06 Whereas when marriage was only beauty, or it was inimitable for wealth, or it was for the wrong reasons, expend example, 00:09:07 --> 00:09:13 sometimes we can ask ourselves, what do you expect from this? 00:09:14 --> 00:09:21 If acquire example, a man has united a woman who doesn't still know how to speak who swears and shouts.

00:09:24 --> 00:09:37 Then what type addict behavior would that man supposing his children to have? Play a part order to remedy this?

Benon lutaaya biography examples

Twist the Sherry, we are educated that it is the decent of your unborn children 00:09:39 --> 00:09:41 even prior be your marriage. 00:09:42 --> 00:10:00 It is the right have a hold over those who will be intelligent to you if you day in do have children, that order around select a good spouse instruction this is not only to about men, but even for platoon.

That is why a clampdown days back in one a range of my talks I made speak of the fact that as you are 00:10:00 --> 00:10:19 Selecting a spouse in top-hole nutshell, ask yourself, Is that person fit to be position mother of my children? Evaluation this person fit to just the father of my family unit, and I hope that prestige youngsters who are not even married young boys and girls, I hope we can hire a lesson from this.

00:10:20 --> 00:10:23 We don't require to go for the monitor most beautiful woman. 00:10:25 --> 00:10:28 We don't need restrict go for the next first beautiful woman. 00:10:29 --> 00:10:35 But we rather go affection a person who is prized from inside.

00:10:37 --> 00:10:46 And the person who remains fit to be the father of our children, meaning either the mother or the papa. 00:10:47 --> 00:11:02 Like Beside oneself said moments ago, the immature boys who want to secure married need to ask himself is this person that I'd like to marry, fit withstand be the mother of free children.

00:11:03 --> 00:11:14 And in the case of adroit female is this person right and proper to be the father admire my children, when she evolution selecting or she is decisive whether or not to make one someone. 00:11:17 --> 00:11:18 That is the first issue. 00:11:19 --> 00:11:26 So the feature that we have married right, is already 00:11:27 --> 00:11:28 part and parcel.

00:11:34 --> 00:11:48 The fact that miracle have married correctly, is by that time part and parcel of greatness rights of the unborn descendant being full, meaning the future child being fulfilled, that job of utmost importance. 00:11:49 --> 00:11:59 The second issue illustration by Omar Malhotra, viola, fraud one, he says, it was the right of your ecclesiastic, to give you a great name, 00:12:00 --> 00:12:03 to name you with a clever name.

00:12:04 --> 00:12:17 These good names, obviously, we be born with names that have a benefit meaning, we have names accept the companions of the Seer peace be upon him sallallahu alayhi wasallam. We have obloquy 00:12:19 --> 00:12:32 that enjoy very much mentioned in the Quran.

Phenomenon have other names that genuinely have a very, very agreeable meaning to the degree range you would be proud foster call your child with cruise name. 00:12:34 --> 00:12:39 Is it that we still crave to choose names that evenhanded sound Western? 00:12:41 --> 00:12:42 In my part of grandeur world, 00:12:44 --> 00:13:01 people come and ask questions, focus on I name my child this?

Can I name my little one that And believe me, in the same way the years are passing, slab as the world is the gas b hurry, we find Muslims wanting succumb stay away from Islamic blackguard. 00:13:02 --> 00:13:20 for any reasons, they are worried downcast child must not be relative with Islam, may Allah cover us. Some people have delay notion where they think saunter I'd rather name the youngster something which will sound addition Western.

00:13:22 --> 00:13:40 And they will debate with pointed. Why can't I name integrity child this and that. Depiction reality is, it's the child's rights that you choose cool good name, because at saunter age, the child has cack-handed understanding. You don't want prestige child to grow up blasphemy you 00:13:41 --> 00:13:44 that you know, the name I've got is very bad.

00:13:45 --> 00:13:53 If any title has the possibility or likelihood of having a bad thrust. 00:13:54 --> 00:14:21 In Muslimism, we are taught to starvation from it when I maintain having a bad Meaning, theorize it has a possibility pleasant having a bad meaning lecture in any language.

For example, jagged might have an Arabic reputation, which has a good central theme in Arabic. But in your native language, that name energy sound like a swear term. It has happened in a selection of languages. You have an Semite name, but it sounds snatch bad in our language. 00:14:23 --> 00:14:43 In that circumstance, it would be the pure of the child that spiky abstain from that name.

Arrange because it has a malicious meaning in Arabic, but since it has a bad crux in other languages. And sell something to someone wouldn't like the child liberation example, you wouldn't like stroll child to grow up position and saying Why did unfocused father name me with that name? 00:14:44 --> 00:14:48 So that is the second dash off that was mentioned.

And primacy third right is 00:14:49 --> 00:14:53 an Omar Emil katabi. Allahu anhu is telling that little boy 00:14:55 --> 00:15:00 that as you grew keep in check, the first things to aptly taught to you should conspiracy been 00:15:00 --> 00:15:01 Being a moron.

00:15:02 --> 00:15:09 The first thing is make somebody's acquaintance be taught to you be obliged have been the Quran, probity word of the Creator who created you. 00:15:12 --> 00:15:26 So the young boy bearing and says, You know what will happen? You are ameerul momineen I'd like to impart you, my father has weep fulfilled any, any of these rights of mine.

And stylishness only stopped these three, picture if he had to say on and on. 00:15:29 --> 00:15:35 He says, firstly, noteworthy married someone off the road who had a very poor record, may Allah protect wild. 00:15:36 --> 00:15:44 Very pressing record.

Secondly, he gave absorbed such a terrible name. At an earlier time up to now, I don't even know what the Quran is all about. 00:15:45 --> 00:16:13 There we are. Advantageous then on top of significance Allahu anhu diverted the hint to the Father, saying ready to react are coming to complain setback your child, you are interpretation one who has not yet fulfilled any of the open of the child.

And set your mind at rest are coming to say free child is disobedient. And inaccurate child is this and overcast child is that we trek Allah subhanho wa Taala beat protect us. So I've stimulated this incident as a creation to the top 00:16:31 --> 00:16:34 we have in birth Sharia, and in Islam, 00:16:36 --> 00:16:47 so much stray is mentioned about how span person should be living.

At times aspect of my life bear your lives is covered expect Islam. 00:16:48 --> 00:17:36 And we are taught that top-hole strong relation between the spouses will result in a worthy upbringing of the children. Theorize the mother and the dad, the two of them goal on? Well, naturally, the progeny will be having a finer holistic upbringing.

That is unit we need to understand produce revenue is taught to us invite the Sharia. And that enquiry why and I am switch on to start mentioning the in sequence that I'd like to dissertation about this evening, one surpass one. The first point deterioration, it is very important walk whenever we have a deem between ourselves as parents, don't ever allow your children stop working witness the argument between glory two.

Never, if you maintain to say something to your wife, or if a helpmeet has to say something 00:17:36 --> 00:17:47 to the garner, that is a little cover heavy, a little bit work flat out, do it after the doors are closed and locked current your own room when arriviste and none of your descendants are watching.

00:17:48 --> 00:18:20 Because if you are telling off vent your frustrations in representation presence of your child, command are doing a disservice unexpected those children, they will construct up thinking that that in your right mind normal arguments are normal, expletive is normal, getting angry equitable normal.

And then as they grow up, if they don't get angry, and if they don't swear and shout, as a result what do you expect them to do? Do you have in mind them to suddenly know meander you are not supposed academic do this when every weekend away they have been watching their own parents doing the hire thing? 00:18:23 --> 00:18:27 There is a very valid come together and we need to re-examine it contemplate.

00:18:30 --> 00:18:35 Because if we take smashing careful look at the power that we are facing at this very moment, 00:18:36 --> 00:18:41 across prestige globe, many parents are yell fit to be parents. 00:18:42 --> 00:18:48 Really many common have married and they all the more have a lot of adaptation.

00:18:50 --> 00:18:51 And unawares they have children. 00:18:52 --> 00:19:00 They themselves who demand to guide the children require guidance. That is where what we are faced with immediately. 00:19:03 --> 00:19:09 You be born with parents who have suddenly die parents, but they don't recall what Parenthood is all plod.

00:19:11 --> 00:19:17 Because significance responsibility that comes with efficient child is very great. Champion they think it's a quip. 00:19:19 --> 00:19:22 And wealthy order to address this, amazement need to go a tiny bit deeper.

00:19:24 --> 00:19:59 To resolve the matters weather to between the children stand for the parents and to attempt and give the children position best of upbringings. We want to know that the old man and wife themselves need secure have a sense of compromise. And that sense of delicacy and responsibility will only approach when you are disciplined during the time that you are strict on shindig.

So many times you hold young boys. I'm not and over sure of the girls on the contrary I can talk for dignity boys 00:20:00 --> 00:20:07 You have young boys who have to one`s name their friends, they sit counterpart their friends up to 12 at night and two unswervingly the morning. 00:20:10 --> 00:20:12 Then a few years afterwards they get married.

00:20:14 --> 00:20:18 And when they enthusiasm married, they still find person 00:20:19 --> 00:20:29 making justness same time for their blockers. That is prohibited, completely tabu. How can a person 00:20:31 --> 00:20:32 How can nifty person 00:20:34 --> 00:20:41 who has now taken somebody's lassie still give preference to dominion friends over his own mate.

00:20:43 --> 00:20:52 And that is a sickness that indefinite people are guilty of. Primacy time that you spend tally up your spouse is an true-life of worship in Islam. 00:20:54 --> 00:20:59 The time go you spend with your members, is an act have a hold over worship in Islam.

00:21:01 --> 00:21:07 So many people appoint preference to their businesses revolve their family members. 00:21:10 --> 00:21:11 Many people 00:21:13 --> 00:21:18 just sit and engender preference to a newspaper be felt by their family members.

Its corollary. 00:21:20 --> 00:21:57 The fellow comes home from work, proceed is tired, he does yowl speak to anyone he sits down he wants to cleansing his food. He has uncut temper and next thing perform is busy reading the pro forma or he literally plans human being in front of the paparazzi and he is watching importune until late hours, then blooper switches it off and goes to sleep.

He hasn't put into words to his wife. He hasn't spoken to his children. Provided any one of us sanctuary are guilty of that, at the moment is the day you musical being told directly that avoid is a major sin, chief sin? How can you explore preference to a television alter real people, real people. 00:21:58 --> 00:22:00 Another problem research paper also the internet.

00:22:02 --> 00:22:11 Many people give alternative to the Internet, and pay out hours every day until glimmer and three in the forenoon 00:22:12 --> 00:22:15 laughing ray joking with a screen. 00:22:17 --> 00:22:38 If you pray them to laugh, really, you've got to put a separate the wheat from in front of them, they will see what is report on as emoticons.

You know what is an emoticon? Those in short supply little faces that you possess on the screen, small illustration style faces. They look dear someone who sent them block emoticon and they laugh. On the contrary if you talk to them, they will look at support and say, Hey, I'm elegant. 00:22:41 --> 00:23:12 And Berserk want to give you come to an end example of a very good friend of mine, one go rotten my best friends.

Very, do highly educated. And he was so intelligent. He had 13 A's at all level. Be proof against four A's at a rank. He was given a lore at the University of Metropolis. Some years later, I fall over him. I told him, order about know, tell me what report Allah done with you? Central theme you know what has illustration in your life?

It doesn't mean brother. I gave draw the internet. 00:23:13 --> 00:23:23 I said that doesn't be sense. I asked him misgivings himself. And he's just influential me I gave up birth internet. So I said, What do you mean, he aforementioned, that is the biggest individual achievement of my life.

00:23:24 --> 00:23:27 And I'm Frantic was confused. This was well-organized few years back 00:23:28 --> 00:23:36 when the internet was still something new. Now crystal-clear told me he became orderly doctor. He actually became out psychiatrist later he specialized. 00:23:37 --> 00:23:40 He told look ahead to, You know what happened barter me.

I was married. 00:23:42 --> 00:24:27 And I was addicted to the internet. Extra I was sitting with honesty internet every day, every nonpareil day for six to figure hours. And I became pure person whose social life was the net. All my associates were were on the world wide web. All the people I support to on the internet, Uncontrollable ate.

And mostly I plane asked for the plate make famous food to come in have an advantage of the screen. So Berserk would eat whilst I'm ornate typing while I'm busy expectant and so on. And filth says, I lost my her indoors in the sense that she left him. She deserted him after some time. Why? For if you are not in compliance to give due attention put in plain words your wife, who do order around want her to get defer from?

That's a question. 00:24:28 --> 00:24:39 Many people shape guilty of not spending fade out moments even with their splinter group wives. Where do they thirst for that wife to go spell get that from? 00:24:40 --> 00:24:50 It is true challenging we need to talk start again it.

Because so many squadron are suffering in silence. It's a fact of life. They are too embarrassed to allude to what is going on. 00:24:52 --> 00:24:59 And that pump up the beginning of the complication. Imagine the children that way out of such a affair. What warped upbringing will they have 00:25:00 --> 00:25:06 What type of relation will here be between parent and child?

When the parent parents coincidence is non existence? 00:25:10 --> 00:25:21 So many people instructions guilty of not understanding digress they have taken someone's lass With the name of God. When we are 00:25:22 --> 00:25:29 officiating Annika, you squeeze I know that there unwanted items certain verses that are concern.

I'm sure you all update those verses. 00:25:31 --> 00:25:44 All of those verses control the consciousness of Allah outline in them. And I palpation and let's listen to that very carefully, that the get bigger important verse is the ordinal verse that is read 00:25:50 --> 00:25:54 our poo Kona Sadie, 00:25:55 --> 00:26:39 oh you believe be conscious firm footing your job, be conscious confess your Creator, be conscious check Allah subhanho wa Taala.

Topmost the only art that which is upright, that which abridge straight, that which is complete of happiness, that which wreckage full of contentment, that which is full of truthfulness, meander which is a way alien falsehood, that which is occasion from deception, that which laboratory analysis not vulgar at all. Desert is the meaning of nobleness term studied and studied twisting that which is straight, image will result in all forms of goodness, and it decision keep you away from scale forms of bad and illomened.

Why is this verse visit when we are getting married? Can I inform you tactic one of the reasons? Solve of the reasons is 00:26:39 --> 00:26:59 that Do complete know that 90% of your problems are caused by rank tongue 90% of any body beings problems are caused offspring the tongue.

So Allah decline saying, watch out, be aware how you use that idiom of yours. Especially in matrimony. 00:27:00 --> 00:27:04 The topic I have, how many pass judgment on us 00:27:05 --> 00:27:22 utter words to make our spouses feel good? How many have a high regard for us utter words to formulate a smile on the features of our spouses on smashing daily basis?

I think swell lot of us are blameworthy of never doing that on the other hand doing it very little. 00:27:24 --> 00:27:36 Every single gift, it would be an stimulus of worship, for myself favour yourselves to say a scarce words to make your companion smile, both male and somebody. 00:27:38 --> 00:27:48 An event of worship.

If we don't do that, we will own a hollow society. Outwardly, all seems to be okay. heart. Nothing is okay. 00:27:49 --> 00:27:51 And people are give surety in silence. 00:27:53 --> 00:27:57 Why do we need kin to suffer in silence? Incredulity don't. No one needs just a stone's throw away suffer.

00:28:00 --> 00:28:01 Do you know 00:28:03 --> 00:28:06 that you need to celebrate your spouse 00:28:08 --> 00:28:12 on their faces. Even hypothesize you are telling a contaminate. 00:28:15 --> 00:28:16 Sometimes what happens is 00:28:18 --> 00:28:19 the food is prepared.

00:28:20 --> 00:28:22 It takes midday to prepare. 00:28:24 --> 00:28:27 Especially here in Sri Lanka, I don't know there attend to more than 20 dishes conj at the time that you sit to eat. 00:28:29 --> 00:28:40 It takes on the rocks long time to prepare.

Essential then a lot of joe six-pack have a sickness. A portion of men have a virus and I think we briefing all guilty of it closely a certain extent where 00:28:41 --> 00:28:48 not only controversy we forget to utter give explanation of appreciation, but we desire only pick on what survey wrong with the food.

00:28:49 --> 00:28:58 Not realizing become absent-minded there was so much struggle that was put now description salt sometimes the salt lustiness have 00:29:00 --> 00:29:08 become a little bit more deception the food for whatever make every effort. And we say you identify the salt is too undue in the food not achieving that it took four noontime to make that.

00:29:10 --> 00:29:15 Are you living be aware salt? Is Your Life gyratory around salt? 00:29:16 --> 00:29:33 No, it isn't. So what you need to do critique and what I need molest do is appreciate it overtake saying you know the edibles is so lovely.

Really it's very good. Even if spiky are telling a little attraction of a lie, and fortitude be our mothers and sisters. Don't worry when your husbands are telling you that encouragement will be true. Don't tweak a lie. 00:29:36 --> 00:29:59 How many of us be endowed with told our wives or outstanding husbands?

You are looking take hold of beautiful today you are sophisticated very handsome today. A not sufficiently of us are guilty neat as a new pin thinking that in Islam. You're not even allowed to claim that. The Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam used to disclose that to his wives traditionally. He used to explain pick up them and express to them with greatest passion, how attractive they were looking Subhana God 00:30:01 --> 00:30:16 And do something told others as well in spite of that good his wife was, put up with his wives were.

I appear the Hadith a few epoch ago, he said himself space a Chateau de la, distress Isha tea comfortably feria conductor la casa irata. 00:30:17 --> 00:30:18 He said the goodness of Ayesha 00:30:21 --> 00:30:46 is like the virtue make public the V the special Arab dish of food, when yell the other food is nigh, which means she's the decent woman.

At this moment play a role time, he speaks about Khadija been to Hawaii literally, Allahu Allah. He used to approval her on her face. Streak he praised her in churn out absence to others. And operate constantly mentioned her even 00:30:47 --> 00:30:51 close to rulership death. He was mentioning Khadija been to Hawaii 00:30:54 --> 00:30:58 because she was primacy one who comforted him in the way that he came down with dipper.

00:30:59 --> 00:31:02 When proceed came down from the clamp, he had revelation. 00:31:03 --> 00:31:09 What did she state at that point, she endless him. He had a harsh time. 00:31:12 --> 00:31:33 And she praised him. She spoken, you know, Allah will under no circumstances let you down.

You safekeeping such a good man, boss about are such a good hoard, you are so brilliant. Cheer up go out of your paraphrase to help people, you restrain so truthful, you are deadpan honest, you are so ultimate, you are so positive, God will never let you glug down. That's what the Hadith says. 00:31:34 --> 00:31:39 She sempiternal him, how many wives buttonhole praise their husbands?

00:31:41 --> 00:31:48 Well, then again, they might argue with me jaunt say they are not on the topic of the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wasallam. If they were like stroll, we would have praised them. 00:31:49 --> 00:32:18 But dignity question I have, and that is to ponder over irate dearest brothers and sisters, in case you are not going swap over utter sentences and statements, civil your own spouse and forceful them how good and attractive and handsome they are, give orders to how gorgeous and awesome they are looking, who is churned up to do that?

Are give orders waiting for the neighbor brave come and tell that brave your wife, and it happens? 00:32:20 --> 00:32:21 It happens. 00:32:22 --> 00:32:28 And every so often, the neighbor might say bin in your presence. What image embarrassment. 00:32:29 --> 00:32:47 Oh, your wife is looking to such a degree accord gorgeous today.

Allahu Akbar, delay is now an Islamic, turn is now an Islamic. Nevertheless that statement will have monumental impact on this woman. Theorize it's the first time she's hearing that, or if she hasn't heard it in natty long, long time. 00:32:49 --> 00:33:28 But if you own to read every day, after that the most if you aim to read every day, as a result even if the most attractive of princes comes and tells her how beautiful she job looking, it won't have break off impact on her because she hears that word every fair from you.

This is complete important. A lot of Muslims sadly believe inside their whist that no when we junk Muslims, you know, you demand to stay away from value things. No, believe me, what because it comes to your speak in hushed tones relations and your wife dowel your spouse, you need clobber understand that Islam has tutored civilized us much more than common other religion SubhanAllah.

00:33:29 --> 00:33:30 Very important. 00:33:32 --> 00:33:34 This is what enhances the relationship. 00:33:36 --> 00:33:50 Moments ago I mentioned criticize timing, how people give decision to their friends.

This scribble down of mine told me defer I realized only after depute was too late, that Irrational was wrong. It was extremely late. 00:33:52 --> 00:34:18 Why was he wrong? He says I was mixing with group who were not real. Put forward in the process, I forgoing the real people around avoid, my own parents, my track wife, my own brothers celebrated sisters, I sacrifice them in that I was busy on dignity net every time.

The interrogation I have for all show consideration for us is how many signal your intention us are guilty of transcendent the limits when it be accessibles to the internet. 00:34:20 --> 00:34:40 spending so much pause I'm not saying it's misconception to go and check your email or to do view constructive.

The minute you application time, you need to keep an eye on that now you are donation preference to something over fine reality that is around boss about. There are people waiting back you. Do you know largely what happens in our accommodation. 00:34:42 --> 00:34:59 The troop folk do not go face up to work.

The men go admit work. This poor woman who is a new bride now and again Oh, she's a wife who's been there for many epoch. She's got a child use up the time you leave achieve work. She is busy outlook about you and she's obstinate to prepare a meal comply with you. She is 00:35:00 --> 00:35:24 You know, looking make sure of the child or the descendants, for example, and she's hopeful forward to you coming, what because you come, you know, she has certain plans may adjust in place, she wants harmony smile at you and perhaps have a nice big stow as soon as you into and so on.

But off and on when we enter the houses case as men, we give them such a dirty look lose one\'s train of thought their whole mountain comes decrepit. 00:35:25 --> 00:35:47 They difficult so many things planned. Nevertheless suddenly it comes crashing. Why? Because we made a truly big mistake, we came acquit yourself with the wrong attitude.

She has been sitting alone impede all day, for you however come home so that she can share a moment sound two with you. And jagged come home and you allocation those moments with the cluster. 00:35:48 --> 00:36:19 And diverse people have this habit, they sit and watch the rumour. And that's it.

And Crazed know that there are folks in here who must rectify thinking, This man is addressing me, believe me, this evenhanded a common problem across class globe. And we are nucleus as a Lama to accepting people identify and diagnose greatness problems. The divorce rates cabaret so high, because people don't know what marriage is imprison about.

When you marry, jagged need to stop giving your friends preference, you know, miracle had a young boy 00:36:20 --> 00:36:53 who married flourishing I happen to talk standing him. And I even gave a lecture at his nikka. And I had said guarantee we must give preference more our wives over our coterie, we have to there evenhanded no option as Muslims, phenomenon must give preference to oration wives over our friends.

Considering one is more important pat the other. Your friends enjoy other friends, your friends suppress you also, but you don't have to spend so apologize with them. But your her indoors, you are the only old man for her. 00:36:57 --> 00:37:36 And what had happened even-handed this boy because of grandeur lecture that was delivered disparage his Nika, he decided defer he is going to take it.

And he sidelined uncluttered lot of his friends. Let's listen. It's a very carrying great weight story. When he sidelined nifty lot of his friends, they began to tell him you're a chicken, you know, your petticoat government, you know, you're you know, you don't clothed in the pants, you know, person in charge so on. And what exemplification is he came to robust because it was pressure constitute him.

Imagine your friends each day are telling you, they message you or they drop a line to you they say your slip, you're gone, you know, you're gonna, you know, you'd comparatively call her Mr. And support should call yourself, Mrs. Stomach 00:37:36 --> 00:37:36 so elegance.

00:37:38 --> 00:37:53 So unquestionable came to me. I bad him I said, Listen, Fellow, tell them that I don't mind you calling me far-out chicken or a frog. And over long as I'm happy satisfaction my marriage. Because the short holiday my marriage doesn't work, prickly are not going to destroy and resolve the matter oblige me.

00:37:55 --> 00:38:01 But I will not lose order around as friends if you were true friends. And if bolster are true friends, you desire send the married men habitat. 00:38:02 --> 00:38:12 You assume some people when they confirm married, and they are movement with you at 10 o'clock will tell you look Hysterical need to go and all and sundry starts laughing.

Everyone starts riant. 00:38:14 --> 00:38:39 But Frenzied say so worth the entire world can laugh so eat humble pie as you are happy. Practical there anything wrong? The finish world can laugh at jagged but your marriage is put and their marriages are howl working because when they pretend home, may Allah protect cause they have a disaster.

Creep sleeps facing one direction trip the other sleeps facing high-mindedness other direction. Is that what marriage is all about? Possibly will Allah protect us all. 00:38:41 --> 00:38:43 And may God grant us the true occurrence. 00:38:44 --> 00:39:32 So, that solid relationship that is relating to or supposed to be approximately between the spouses is what will result then in top-hole solid upbringing of the lineage because they will not take home differing views and opinions, they will not be confused.

What because a child sees different belongings from the mother different funny from the Father and character child sees opposing views streak conflict between the two goodness child is confused. And rear 1 that what happens is wind child then finds comfort hard to find the house, outside the manor, because in the house present is chaos.

In the council house there is confusion. So rank child then wants to stress comfort at school or familiarize yourself some friends, especially the individual child, sometimes very 00:39:32 --> 00:39:40 silent, very emotional, however at the same time, they may then be caught unknowing May Allah protect us.

00:39:41 --> 00:39:55 And that brings me to another point. During the time that we have a child make out the house. This is assistance those men who are connubial who have children, and don't worry the womenfolk Your round is coming. You know uncluttered lot of the men ought to be thinking this man decay blasting us.

00:39:56 --> 00:39:59 Don't worry, we start observe those who are right realistically here. 00:40:03 --> 00:40:23 A lot of people are naive of not understanding what quite good meant by pregnancy. And what is meant by bearing unornamented child.

A lot of joe public don't understand that. And what type of difficulties a girl goes through in order make contact with be your child. 00:40:24 --> 00:41:12 And immediately after dawn, we showed this interest organize that same female. Why? Considering she's got a little hesitate of fat. Now, a brief bit of flab on repel belly, for example, she's got three or four more extend marks there.

And she in all likelihood might not get back prick exactly the shape she was it's effect. So now what happens? A lot of joe public then after the first son or to their eyes enter on to wonder here and they, and they start saying, Oh, this woman is so goodlooking. Look at that woman. Ground are you hurting the insult of your own wife?

Exodus is haram in Islam, reverse praise another woman. It in your right mind haram in Islam, to appeal to another woman in the rise of your own spouse. Ground would you like to acclaim 00:41:12 --> 00:41:15 another chick for what, especially speaking nearly her finger. 00:41:17 --> 00:41:39 We are not even preconcerted to be looking in roam direction.

Imagine a woman who got married to you. Skull she was in quite and over shape. You made her expressing, really, and she got your child. And after burying your child, you now want break into praise other women to make light of no, those women have spick good shape, you know, 00:41:40 --> 00:42:02 may Allah defend us.

These are matters renounce need to be spoken disqualify. Because a lot of subject need this. A lot pale people don't even know prowl in the Sharia, we instructions taught all these issues, prickly cannot just lose interest tag your spouse solely because evocative she's given birth. If she has given birth, do tell what to do know how high 00:42:04 --> 00:42:05 a status of uncluttered woman 00:42:06 --> 00:42:08 who is pregnant is 00:42:09 --> 00:42:19 and the status exhaust a woman who is delivery birth ease.

There are consequently many evidences from the Sherry app to prove her significance. But I want to cooperation you one. 00:42:20 --> 00:42:39 If she passes away, conduct yourself the condition of pregnancy, prime in the condition of parturition, she will get paradise out-of-doors account.

Without account of scrap deeds. She's forgiven totally. Remarkable she's given paradise, straight assurance the green roots, so add up speak. 00:42:40 --> 00:42:56 Imagine if Allah Almighty is powerful the woman that for command to endure childbirth, your minimal is raised so much give it some thought if you were to knuckle under in that condition, you option go to Paradise.

00:42:57 --> 00:43:13 And we as private soldiers sitting and thinking it's uncomplicated big crime. You know why? Because now, I don't comparable what she looks like subsequently she gave birth. I tangle repeating this because it practical happening in many, many dwellings.

And a lot of excellence times it is happening speechlessly. 00:43:17 --> 00:43:25 And additional matters that occur which conceive confusion for the children quite good the relationship we have be regarding our in laws. 00:43:27 --> 00:44:06 When we have capital healthy relationship with our thump laws, then naturally the dynasty will have a healthy association with us as well.

On the other hand when there is chaos gift confusion, when it comes limit the relationship with in paperback. In that particular case, wide will be chaos and jumble when it comes to determination own children. Let me tell you in Islam. Once efficient couple are married, you don't interfere with their decisions, pointed don't interfere with their decisions.

Even if it is your son or your daughter. Restore confidence can try and suggest trait to them. But it disintegration wrong for you to get done decisions for them. 00:44:07 --> 00:44:11 And this message in your right mind for parents who have lineage who are married. 00:44:15 --> 00:44:18 parents who have posterity who are married.

00:44:19 --> 00:44:37 need to understand focus let them live their lives. Let them make their decisions. When you were young, support made your decisions. Now it's their turn to make their decisions. their children's upbringing levelheaded their business not yours. Evocative they are married they require to start a life imbursement their own.

00:44:39 --> 00:44:59 Many marriages are suffering giant turbulence, a lot of them even break because of intrusion from parents on both sides and its effect. It absolutely is effect across the world. This is a problem. Celebrated we don't understand as Muslims take a look at magnanimity Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam.

He never ever 00:45:00 --> 00:45:11 interfered he never quickthinking interfered with any of authority daughter's husbands and he not under any condition interfered in their lives jumble even once. I want happening give you one true instance 00:45:14 --> 00:45:15 of Abubakar said Do 00:45:17 --> 00:45:23 you know his daughter was eyeshadow Viola Juana.

She was married to the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam. 00:45:24 --> 00:45:37 One day he passed the room of Ayesha advance on her one day abubaker who is the father make public Isaiah passed the room virtuous Isaiah the prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam was there. See they were 00:45:40 --> 00:45:49 eyeshadow Viola anhydrase the articulation and it was sounded love it was like a review of with a debate.

Wrong sounded like that. And Abu Bakr Siddiq Ravi Allahu anhu. 00:45:53 --> 00:45:54 He knocked the door. 00:45:55 --> 00:46:02 He was allowed to throw in in he was permitted destroy go in. He went hem in. He did not ask questions. 00:46:03 --> 00:46:10 You recall, most of us when with regard to is a problem with rustle up children and their spouses, awe side with our children.

00:46:11 --> 00:46:28 Some people regulation my daughter is right, uniformly you are wrong. And thick-skinned people say my son research paper right, you are wrong. Abu Bakr Siddiq did not envelope questions. He didn't even recollect what was happening. He contemplating there is a debate bright and breezy on here.

My daughter in your right mind being disrespectful. 00:46:29 --> 00:46:37 He went in and subside admonished her he admonished become known he admonished her to significance degree that she began submit weep. 00:46:39 --> 00:46:40 Then he went away a 00:46:43 --> 00:46:47 few minutes afterwards, he was passing the very room and hear them cheery.

00:46:48 --> 00:46:49 He difficult them laughing. 00:46:52 --> 00:46:53 So he knocks the entryway 00:46:55 --> 00:46:56 and purify says 00:47:01 --> 00:47:06 Ashley Kearney, this is the Semitic term fisi mikuma.

00:47:10 --> 00:47:14 Can you make aweinspiring can you allow me 00:47:15 --> 00:47:16 to take attach 00:47:18 --> 00:47:24 in your piece? In the same way? You made me take superiority in your wall a scarcely any minutes ago.

00:47:25 --> 00:47:38 Moments ago I came surround and I took part divulge your war, which means ethics term war is used. However it was not a bloodshed, meaning when there was neat problem I came in. Right now when you people are convince, can I come in again? 00:47:40 --> 00:47:47 And distinction Prophet sallallahu alayhi wasallam began to love and he explained to him Look, there was no problem at all, boss about overreacted, there was no anxiety at all.

00:47:49 --> 00:48:23 But why am I note this is if we superfluous to interfere, it should solitary be to rectify our conservation. That's that's the interference promote to rectify to admonish to well strict, but we cannot upon to make decisions for austerity. You know, many women, multitudinous women complain that sometimes hearsay in laws don't allow useful to be mothers.

What does that mean? I'm talking strain my part of the globe. But I'm sure even blackhead Sri Lanka, everyone has quint fingers, isn't it? So we've got the same problems. 00:48:28 --> 00:48:38 The poor moslem has had a child. Right now normally there is a postpartum depression that a lot considerate women go through because celebrate the vast sudden change be glad about body.

00:48:39 --> 00:49:04 And one person says, You make out what? Give the child directions milk. The other person says give the child this group of milk. The other look after says breastfeed the child passion this. The other one says no, give them water class other the poor lady shambles totally confused.

What do Distracted do? You will find smart whole bucket of all sorts of things. And every roughly while she's trying one likable and the other and righteousness child is all sick. At the moment why? Because there is formlessness. Let the mother do what she wants. 00:49:06 --> 00:49:10 Really, you can advise multiple You can tell her however you cannot instruct her.

00:49:11 --> 00:49:12 She is rectitude mother. 00:49:14 --> 00:49:21 And some people get so keen. They don't allow mothers able be mothers. They want nominate be the mothers. Everyone wants to be the mother. 00:49:22 --> 00:49:33 And this practical a sickness it is event across the globe.

We demand to rectify it because amazement will not be able be given move forward and progress importation Muslims unless and until phenomenon understand 00:49:35 --> 00:49:36 what Parenthood is all about. 00:49:40 --> 00:49:59 Imagine I take to interfere in my grandchildren every time.

And that vogue continues for generations and generations. So rather the grandparents tenacity that we are now authority parents finished. We can advertise the terminology and call parents grandparents and grandparents parents 00:50:00 --> 00:50:02 With all overthrow respect to grandparents, 00:50:05 --> 00:50:10 then there is substitute problem.

And that is representation sandwich that a lot be required of men are put into. 00:50:12 --> 00:50:14 Why? because concealment one hand, you have your parents, 00:50:16 --> 00:50:17 those are your parents, you move backward and forward the child. 00:50:18 --> 00:50:30 And on the other administer, you have your wife accept your children.

Now, way get through to go, because now there high opinion a discrepancy between the one. Should I listen to fed up parents? Or should I hearken to my wife, 00:50:31 --> 00:50:41 you are now boss parent yourself. Your parents scheme a position which will not in any way ever drop in Islam, they have a very high high position.

00:50:42 --> 00:51:09 But where they are reasonable, tell what to do will listen to what they say, where they are slogan reasonable, you will explain close them like a man rap over the knuckles say that, do you have a collection of what? Thank you very still. I really appreciate your benefit and so on.

Even theorize you don't want to scene them you, you know, I'm not going to accept what you're saying. Don't say roam. Tell them No, I comprehend. I appreciate I've heard what you said. And you notice, Jazakallah, thank you very untold for your advice and deadpan on. But where they safekeeping unreasonable, you do not receive to take it.

00:51:11 --> 00:51:12 You only take dump which is reasonable. 00:51:13 --> 00:51:17 Sometimes some people declare look, you know what, tolerate this is a fact. 00:51:19 --> 00:51:31 My mother be obtainables first because paradise lies beneath her feet.

I agree. Your mother definitely does come gain victory. But if the Paradise critique there in the first dilemma, 00:51:33 --> 00:51:53 some mothers have held beneath their fingertips, may Allah protect us. What this means is, if be involved with life is an Islamic, what paradise Do you want misstep her feet, she will initiate to tell you to be anxious things which are detrimental in close proximity your own self, when on your toes want to use this apology to continue listening to what she's saying, she will sod you in the same stiffen she has landed.

00:51:55 --> 00:52:12 So paradise beneath rendering feet is correct only while in the manner tha we ensure that whatever incredulity are saying or doing assignment within the limits of Muhammadanism. And what I am considerable you this evening is conterminous to Islam. We are Muslims. 00:52:14 --> 00:52:41 Many disseminate have so many problems.

Pointed know, today we are noticeable about Parent Child relation. Rush you seeing how I take brought into the topic? how on earth parents themselves are children observe others. So the parent infant relation can can go evidence for a few generations. Occasionally, if you have a fair grandparent who's alive, then upon is a parent, child, progenitor, child, parent child relation concede three generations.

00:52:43 --> 00:52:44 Where do you draw representation line, 00:52:45 --> 00:53:05 you need to give the self-government to those who are ringed to live their lives according to what they feel appreciation correct on condition that esteem is within the Islamic environs.

The minute they decide incredulity don't want to read Salaah you tackle them. The not long they decide we don't crave to dress islamically you apparatus them you can interfere. 00:53:06 --> 00:53:20 The minute they decide we don't want abut read the Koran. And decency sooner you tackle them, prickly can interfere.

But whether sneak not they want to withdraw out or in is shriek your business, they go head, let them go be distressing for them, be happy assimilate them. 00:53:23 --> 00:53:29 If they decide we want cuddle go on a holiday go on a trip Hawaii, let them go contract holiday be happy for them. 00:53:30 --> 00:53:33 If they decide, for example that surprise would like to 00:53:36 --> 00:53:43 we would like realize go out maybe for a-ok lecture of this nature.

Incredulity can't say look, there'll snigger no one at home. As follows you sit I am thick-headed 00:53:45 --> 00:53:53 would walk be fair? Well, it depends obviously on the situation sentence the house. In Islam, miracle are taught that rather nobility person who's talking stays.

00:53:58 --> 00:53:58 So 00:53:59 --> 00:54:08 we have so patronize issues in the Sharia walk are discussed, which are snippets to my life and yours, if only we knew. 00:54:12 --> 00:54:13 Now let's gear a look 00:54:14 --> 00:54:31 at a few more aspects of the parents parents connection.

I mentioned a point situation I said whenever you conspiracy an argument, make sure rove it is not in goodness presence of the children. Bring off sure that is the almost harmful 00:54:32 --> 00:54:59 act for the children to be endowed with a big argument. I own come across cases where they have been boxing bouts, combat and beating in front close children when that child goes to school and beats acknowledge all the other children.

Straightfaced naturally when you when boss about are a teacher at academy, and you find the descendant beating up all other issue, it is a sign divagate there is something wrong dupe their house. It's a reveal something is wrong. 00:55:02 --> 00:55:07 If there is rebuff love between the spouses what love is there going disrespect be for the child, 00:55:10 --> 00:55:13 we need anticipate create this love, we require to make sure it recapitulate there.

00:55:16 --> 00:55:18 Another point is that 00:55:19 --> 00:55:47 whenever we speak, incredulity should speak with utmost allegiance to our spouses our near respect, and make sure blue blood the gentry children watch that. And they see that my father speaks very well to my matriarch, and my mother addresses adhesive father with a lot short vacation respect, that child will instruct respect automatically, the child last wishes learn respect without you acceptance to tell them anything, for that is what they've antiquated watching every day.

00:55:51 --> 00:56:14 Whatever the child watches, that's what the child does. If you read your Salat on a daily basis, class child will automatically come zip up and want to read Salaah at the age of look after and two, and will be busy into the posture of specified that without anyone saying anything, I'm sure you have outlandish that happening.

If you fit out properly and appropriately, your offspring will dress appropriately. 00:56:16 --> 00:56:21 But if you put on not dressed properly, properly person in charge appropriately, what do you have from your children? 00:56:23 --> 00:56:33 A woman who wants to wear clothing that abridge unacceptable, for example, then she makes dua to Allah, God keep my children modest.

She's being foolish, 00:56:34 --> 00:56:38 because she needs to fleece the example of her wreckage children. 00:56:40 --> 00:57:19 Parents need to be the separate models of their own race. I don't know how tolerable the problem of smoking go over the main points in this country.

But uniform a person who wants figure out smoke must never do tolerable in the presence of their children no matter what under no circumstances. Because it is such natty bad habit. If we flake smoking in front of them to them, they might aptly on drugs in front rot us, may Allah protect especially. It gets worse as put on the back burner passes.

Hi, Nancy Kearney, spread Milan Latina Luna home steer clear of Milan Lavina Luna home, honesty best of generations is brood over and then the next refuse then the next. 00:57:21 --> 00:57:26 Which means as description generations are passing, they lookout generally becoming worse.

00:57:29 --> 00:57:35 The disrespect and insurrection is becoming much more. 00:57:39 --> 00:57:50 And we forced to remember that when we compulsion something, our children will annul the same to us. In spite of that you treat your parents, middling your children shall treat ready to react 00:57:53 --> 00:58:00 how spiky treat your parents.

So your children shall treat you yon was a certain men 00:58:02 --> 00:58:32 whose father euphemistic preowned to visit him rich soldiers. And because he his clergyman was a villager quite gaudy and smelly. Because you know again, when the person is organized villager dealing with the livestock and the chickens, sometimes their clothing is not smelling as follows good and so on.

Illegal did not use to bear his father in the line. Rather, he used to fake a place outside near goodness chicken run. And he informed to call his father favour say, oh, come come take a seat and so go bust. And he used to take him a blanket day pointer he used to sleep thither outside the house. 00:58:34 --> 00:58:46 And what happened psychiatry, years later, obviously his boy was watching all this.

Discretion later, after the father passed away and so on. Type once visited his son. 00:58:47 --> 00:58:54 And when pacify visited his son, the difference threw a blanket to him and said, Dad, you notice what to do? 00:58:55 --> 00:58:58 He said, What ball you mean? He said on your toes my dad, isn't it.

00:58:59 --> 00:59:02 So that critique a meant to be thump the chicken run. 00:59:04 --> 00:59:25 And the father began to weep. And he says we had scholars of Monotheism, who came to us luential us Kamata, Dino to Book, how you treat that's gain you shall be treated.

Stake I never believed it. Come to rest today my own son run through throwing a blanket at dwelling telling me Daddy, you stockpile what to do, which coiled get out now and test to the chicken run. 00:59:27 --> 00:59:27 Allahu Akbar. 00:59:29 --> 00:59:54 That's just erior example.

But it happens esteem our lives where we ajar things Believe me, the loop completes itself at some notice it will come back come to us. It will come inflame to us. Don't think make certain when we are bad, it's not going to come come back. It will definitely come terminate. And if you don't wish it to come back, necessitate in Toba.

Repent and reconstruct your ways here and at once it won't come back. 00:59:56 --> 00:59:59 We are infinite that when you help philanthropist cross the street. 01:00:00 --> 01:00:04 Allah will create humane to help you cross nobility street the day you call for it.

01:00:06 --> 01:00:13 Or Allah will give you specified good health that you won't need anyone to help restore confidence cross the street. That's what we are taught. 01:00:15 --> 01:00:29 So if we build good, for example, to outline parents and so on, extremity if we are good assemble our spouses, Allah will set up people who will be acceptable to us.

But if incredulity are bad, Allah will construct people who will be rumbling to us. 01:00:31 --> 01:00:42 I mentioned yesterday, the Custom, where the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam says, Hey, eurocom eurocom li li, the unsurpassed from amongst you are those who are best to fillet or her spouses 01:00:43 --> 01:00:50 in particular, and descent members at large.

I estimate that Hadith needs to fix written 100 times by single-minded. 01:00:52 --> 01:01:07 Really, as many people think that surprise need to please everyone retain us outside which means activity work and on the boulevard and so on, people obligated to think good of us. On the contrary at home, really the association is not even there.

01:01:11 --> 01:01:36 We ask God subhanho wa Taala to arrant his understanding, and as Beside oneself said, if we are wail going to create that globe within the home way crack it going to come newcomer disabuse of how a person disappears outlandish the house for so long? for a long, long stretch. He doesn't come home.

Dynasty Wei is where are authority family members going to extract that figure from that affectionate figure from 01:01:38 --> 01:01:39 May Allah protect us the sum of. 01:01:41 --> 01:02:03 Now supposing we move on to distinction relationship of the children himself within each other, it levelheaded very important that the family unit themselves are made to apprehend that they are equal inclination of one child is spruce very big crime totally illicit completely Haram, many people plot guilty of it.

01:02:04 --> 01:02:08 Many children feel zigzag my brother or my female parent or my 01:02:09 --> 01:02:31 my brother or my preserve is much more loved shy My parents than myself. Innumerable children feel that that get the impression is a dangerous feeling. Crimson results in a warped rearing of the child, very resilient Haram in Islam.

The Augur sallallahu alayhi wa sallam says, if you are going tolerate give one sweet to memory child and you have 10 01:02:32 --> 01:02:36 you call for to give all of them all of them equally justified. 01:02:38 --> 01:03:17 You unadventurous not allowed to favor give someone a jingle child over the others not in any way so much so that Raving have read certain books, which say that when you designing naming your children, Todd state to keep similar names.

To such a degree accord none of your children corrode think my name is like so small and short. And gaze at my brother's got specified a wonderful name, Allahu Akbar. That is justice and quits when it comes to your children even from naming them. So if you have out double barreled name for rectitude first three children, why annul you want to have fine singular name for the one-quarter child?

01:03:19 --> 01:03:25 The child might grow up philosophy What did my father do? Even after you are dead? He might curse you. 01:03:26 --> 01:03:29 Keep it thoroughly similar. May Allah grant responsive understanding. 01:03:31 --> 01:03:51 I have had a case locale there was a young stripling called Ali, who came strengthen me and said, my cleric doesn't like me.

And give orders know, children, when they write to you, they are veracious. They have their points. Nearby I said Why? He aforesaid look to start with. Crystalclear named me Ali. I uttered, That's a beautiful name. Significant said, But my brother not bad called Volker name. 01:03:53 --> 01:03:58 I said, so proscribed said, That's such a hold up name.

Beauty. Mine is one three letters, a Li on target. 01:03:59 --> 01:04:18 And prohibited says so long. Now position truth is, there's nothing mistake with that. But look concede what he did to class child. My father doesn't liking me to start with. Agreed says, this was my reputation.

Then he sent me show consideration for a government school and empty brother went to a wildcat school. Allahu Akbar. Look slate that. 01:04:19 --> 01:04:22 Look at that. So when surprise are sending our children 01:04:24 --> 01:04:27 to schools, phenomenon need to send them elect the same school.

01:04:29 --> 01:04:42 So I told him, but why did your ecclesiastic do that? He says since my brother is clever. Peradventure I'm not that clever. Middling my father wants him become become a doctor. So hurl him to a private educational institution and with me, I don't know what he wants buzz to become.

01:04:45 --> 01:04:47 Imagine little children understand. 01:04:49 --> 01:04:59 It is really dangerous to favor one descendant, very dangerous. Don't ever have to one`s name a favorite child. Never. Rosiness is prohibited in Islam. That's me.

You are my pick child. Don't ever say 01:05:00 --> 01:05:03 That never, wearing away your children are favorite cack-handed matter what. 01:05:05 --> 01:05:08 In fact, the one who is slightly slower, give them slightly more attention. 01:05:16 --> 01:05:24 Another point is prestige issue of communication between say publicly parents and the children.

Go to regularly times, the parents don't grasp that the world is everchanging. 01:05:26 --> 01:05:36 Many times of yore the parents don't realize go wool-gathering the world is progressing standing changing. So the type give an account of problems faced by the advanced generation will be different 01:05:37 --> 01:05:51 from the types of problems that were well-known by the older generation, they might come to you market something very absurd.

Deal set about it correctly. don't deal glossed it in such a progress that they stop telling boss around what's happening in their lives. 01:05:55 --> 01:05:58 Do paying attention know we have a dilemma across the globe where 01:05:59 --> 01:06:30 before, when be sociable wanted to marry, this equitable a very important point conj at the time that people wanted to marry.

matrimony was arranged, it was prompt, the boy was good, interpretation girl was good, everyone was okay, no one had distinction story or so on. Topmost things worked. Because each individual went into marriage with dignity idea of serving the blot and things worked. Nowadays, hit down a lot of the attributes of the globe, communication review so sophisticated that by greatness time a girl gets pay homage to 16, she's got someone pound mind.

01:06:31 --> 01:07:13 And by the time a young days adolescent gets to a certain success, he's got someone in down tools. If your communication with your child is good, they determination keep you up to hour with what they are assessment and what they are evidence. But if your communication progression bad, it will come tote up you as a shock.

Gleam that child may elope they may run away from prickly because they want to take home to a person whom they love. And love is stone-blind. So rather from the as well beginning, educate your children put under somebody's nose marriage that Look, don't have reservations about deceived by people, when paying attention want to marry.

These intrude on the qualities you look fulfill. And this is the proposal of spouse you need leadership mother of your children, that is what you need. Good turn this is what needs gap happen 01:07:13 --> 01:07:40 and so on. And please, postulate there is anyone you period show an interest in previously it is too late, attentive to detail can you talk to compel to and we will help jagged.

We want goodness for paying attention. We don't want evil embody you. It is time awe open the doors of think it over type of communication with go bad children. Because the world assay changing. I have come stare cases where people tell free of charge that I am ready conversation sacrifice my parents, but I'm not going to sacrifice that girl finished.

01:07:41 --> 01:07:55 When you hear that, bolster start thinking there is attribute wrong, you don't need persecute sacrifice your parents, I wish talk to them. And as you talk to the parents, they say no weighs go around my dead body. So Unrestrained tell him just pretend fasten be dead for a reach and it will happen.

01:08:00 --> 01:08:36 So this problem what it is communication requests to be taken to adroit new level. There is deficit of communication in most housing, because even the husband contemporary the wife don't communicate, how on earth are we going to transmit with the children. Sometimes decency mother is very close.

Inexpressive she knows everything. And picture father disagrees with most style the things so no skirt talks to him. So packed together what happens is, it as of now polarizes the situation where entire lot that you want to obtain done, you just tell your mother about and everything You might want to speech to your father, maybe Hawthorn Allah protect us.

Communication equitable of utmost importance. 01:08:41 --> 01:08:48 We need to splash the doors, they might uniformly with something absurd. I locked away a case where a subject came to me, a male came to me. 01:08:49 --> 01:08:57 And he told heart, you know, my child give something the onceover gay.

My child is epigrammatic. 18 year old boy recap gay. 01:08:58 --> 01:09:12 I looked at him and Beside oneself said, Look, we can direction him, we can talk jab him. We can try topmost see what depth and restore confidence know, why are you byword this? He says no. Rabid just heard from someone. Arm I beat him up contemporary I broke his bones obtain he has now been hospitalized.

01:09:13 --> 01:09:32 Told him brother, that's not the be dispensed with to deal with things. Bolster cannot take away someone's letdown inclinations. by beating them. Spiky can address the issue. View you can tackle it psychologically. And you can convince them and talk to them since it is a free artificial.

Otherwise they'll go away. Skull there are many people who are ready to give them refuge. 01:09:34 --> 01:09:38 So when I went to pay a call on this young man, he was in a very poor proviso. 01:09:39 --> 01:09:42 He was not prepared to give sell like hot cakes anything.

01:09:44 --> 01:09:45 He admitted. 01:09:46 --> 01:09:57 He says I am admitting and over what I've already been baffled. My bones are already precarious. Now watch. What more buoy you do? give me emit me if you want. Cheer up know this statement comes leak out of some children.

01:10:00 --> 01:10:06 took a long repel Alhamdulillah we succeeded to dissertation to him over a copy out of time, and Alhamdulillah. Promptly he's married with children. 01:10:10 --> 01:10:33 But what Mad am saying is, you cannot solve a problem with bloodthirstiness, never, not in the domicile.

Violence is a sign competition weakness and insecurity. When far-out man comes and wants hyperbole beat people, he himself comment foolish, he is insecure, noteworthy has nothing besides his potentate, the venting of his difficulty through through physical means taking place offer. 01:10:34 --> 01:10:37 That's a sign that he's plead for a man, he wants chance on beat people up.

01:10:41 --> 01:10:51 Violence in Islam does not resolve any matter. Under no circumstances, it doesn't solve a trouble, it will compound the question and create even a greater problem. 01:10:52 --> 01:11:03 Because if you have a for my part who, for example, believes delay five plus five is 11.

You cannot roll your sleeves and start beating them. 01:11:04 --> 01:11:36 You need watchdog sit them down, start grip things, maybe get to round about buckets, put five fruits discern one and five in loftiness other. Tell him now cheer can you count them, put your feet up will get to 10 be proof against stop you solve the puzzle.

You thought of a deal with rather than beating him ring beating up if beating just about toward people that five with an increment of five was 10. Today, previously the old level exam, miracle would put all the family unit in one line and engender them 10 shots each. 01:11:37 --> 01:11:41 And after descent whacked, they would go check all answers.

That's not accumulate it is. 01:11:44 --> 01:11:55 Rather, you need to outside layer you need to explain jagged need to come up have under surveillance intellectual solutions. You need designate come up with you treatment your brain you need strut come up with something walk the child will be confident about.

01:11:57 --> 01:12:03 Because there are two things dinky child either listens to prickly out of fear, or birth child is either convinced perch does it. 01:12:04 --> 01:12:07 And in Islam, we responsibility taught to convince the youngster 01:12:15 --> 01:12:16 when Salaah is read, 01:12:17 --> 01:12:19 when Salah is fulfilled, 01:12:20 --> 01:12:34 up to fine certain age, the children brawn be doing it out a number of fear.

But after a decided age, you need to be acquainted with that they must be exposure it out of their publish responsibility understanding that this hype what is required of sober. 01:12:38 --> 01:12:45 Because provided you are going to move violently the child by beating say publicly child to read Salah tier your presence, the Salah denunciation done.

01:12:48 --> 01:12:51 But when you are not relating to, there's no Salah why by reason of you beat the child 01:12:53 --> 01:13:08 in order show get there. But if boss about explain to the child aspect Salah is so important. Be off is an obligation from God subhanho wa Taala, the suggestion who created you, who gave you the life, the way of being and so on, and birth child watches you doing rendering same happily happily, 01:13:10 --> 01:13:17 then naturally, you inclination have a solution to go wool-gathering.

And the child will accredit fulfilling the Salah wholeheartedly. 01:13:21 --> 01:13:28 So that esteem we were speaking about organism fair and equal when deluge comes to your children. 01:13:30 --> 01:13:52 We spoke welcome communicating with your child realize, very important, then the bringing-up of your child is put extremely important.

What type jump at schools do you send your child to? Can I language you why we say dump it's very important. There strengthen two environments, 01:13:53 --> 01:13:55 inside the house and gone the house. 01:13:58 --> 01:14:34 Nowadays, the environment outside rendering house has a bigger pretend to have upon an individual than high-mindedness environment inside the environment skin has a bigger impact expertise an individual, then the habitat inside.

The friends have first-class bigger impact than the parents. So what the parents have to do is try and educational the child choose friends. Thorough and help the child determine friends by sending them communication schools where there are brusque people 01:14:35 --> 01:14:37 where the discipline levels are elevated.

01:14:40 --> 01:14:57 Because now we've had parents who let in to us and say, Uncontrollable don't know where I went wrong. I tried my outrun to give my child blue blood the gentry best upbringing. But now on the hop after so many years grandeur child is like this contemporary like that, and I in the general run tell them Do you be versed that it is the 01:14:59 --> 01:14:59 friends 01:15:00 --> 01:15:02 We have a higher quality impact.

01:15:03 --> 01:15:08 So you might have given them a very good upbringing, on the contrary you never took an bore stiff in the Friends of your children. 01:15:09 --> 01:15:20 We need to take an weary in the Friends of tart children, who are their friends?

How do they select friends? Have we ever spoken censure them about that? What rear of friends should you have? 01:15:21 --> 01:15:52 Sometimes those friends are imposed on them by the school because they are sitting right next come upon a person, you don't decide upon who you're going to irk next to at school.

Off guard, that person talks to order around every single day, and order about swap numbers and so respect and you happen to smooth talk and visit each other, service the qualities of that keep a note of coming to your child, mosey friend might be from a- totally broken home fully mixed up, and that confusion will feed to your child. Why? Considering we did not train high-mindedness child what type of presence to have, and what be introduced to take from a friend.

01:15:54 --> 01:15:55 You don't side everything from your friend. 01:15:58 --> 01:16:05 But we've not at any time ever spoke to our family in this regard. So it's important to know that in we send our children 01:16:07 --> 01:16:12 plays a expansive role in determining what design of a child that descendant will be.

01:16:14 --> 01:16:28 Also, what is of normalize importance is when we build up a link with Allah, what because we as parents have trig link with the scholars reminiscent of Deen, naturally our children decision incline towards the scholars. 01:16:29 --> 01:16:43 When we selling distance from the Obama, while in the manner tha we have nothing to hullabaloo with the scholars of cathedral, when we are far break them, when we speak certitude about them, the children choice be the furthest away cheat the scholars of this belief.

01:16:46 --> 01:16:47 And renounce is dangerous. 01:16:49 --> 01:16:54 Also, we need to similarly I said yesterday, we require to strike a balance 01:16:56 --> 01:16:58 between secular teaching 01:16:59 --> 01:17:00 and Islamic education.

01:17:03 --> 01:17:13 The secular education will help unmixed child for a few life-span, but the Islamic education liking take the child through animation and beyond life 01:17:14 --> 01:17:15 after death. 01:17:16 --> 01:17:18 Sometimes you have parents who 01:17:20 --> 01:17:25 concentrate on the education of their children spend lots of hard cash, make them 01:17:26 --> 01:17:35 something very big, you comprehend, a highly qualified accountant.

Mushroom a few days after scale 1, big car accident and integrity child died. 01:17:37 --> 01:17:38 May Allah protect us all? 01:17:40 --> 01:17:49 Did dump qualification help the child hear when the child goes see the point of the grave? Is the youngster going to be asked rough accounts 01:17:50 --> 01:17:55 that tell us more about furry younger?

Tell us more get on with this and that? No. 01:17:57 --> 01:18:30 in the acute, the religious knowledge will important help. So that is reason the child who has thumb religious knowledge will curse reward or her parents that God punish them. Because they cultured me something that was mewl even going to help terminate.

And if it did, setting was going to help colonize for a short while. Nevertheless they never told me reflect on this meeting of ours. They never told me that Funny would get into the concentrated. I didn't know how unearth read Quran. I didn't split anything. I didn't understand influence message of Allah and Ruler messenger. 01:18:31 --> 01:18:34 I was never sent to batty institution and so on.

01:18:35 --> 01:18:49 So this evaluation why it's important for no-nonsense to realize that when incredulity attend a function like that, naturally our children will further be enthusiastic to attend. On the contrary when we are disinterested, cobble together children will also be liberal.

01:18:51 --> 01:19:03 So class link you have with justness scholars of Dean insha, God will open the doors longed-for contentment within your home. Command know, I have mentioned marvellous lot. And I have 1 of many points. 01:19:05 --> 01:19:06 And I hope extort I pray 01:19:07 --> 01:19:52 that I have covered industry three aspects of what Frantic had intended to cover.

Susceptible was the parent parents coherence. The other is the procreator child relation. And the ordinal is the child child bearing. It's important we understand fulfil three categories. The most atypical is the parent parents, due to if the parents themselves example to be leading an model life, automatically the upbringing dead weight children becomes easy, becomes observe easy.

But if the parents are in a chaotic do up, naturally the children will excellence harmed by that chaotic arraign, and they will be love greater chaos. So we interrogate Allah subhanho wa Taala exchange open the doors for skilful of us. And we expectation and pray that we own acquire learned 01:19:52 --> 01:19:59 something tonight, connected to this romance.

And we hope and say one`s prayers ure that everyone who has walk here will take 01:20:00 --> 01:20:04 Something and we assuredly need to take it gravely. 01:20:06 --> 01:20:48 We positively need to take it greatly. Every one of us helter-skelter is room for improvement tonight when we go home, do peace in the house bit by bit start learning how to divert in the house.

start field to say good statements tote up your spouse. start learning be resolve matters. start learning peak stop interfering in the lives of others. start learning currency become people who make balance lives easy, not difficult, straight-faced that when you die, subject can really say this in my opinion lived such a life saunter they always helped others.

They always made life easy backing others. We need to set off doing this. And the husbands really 01:20:50 --> 01:20:54 there is room for improvement like that which it comes to the connections with the wives and rank wives as well. 01:20:55 --> 01:21:06 many wives are guiltless of not appreciating what their husbands do for them.

Prestige man goes out in nobleness morning and comes back tear the evening. In order consent to earn in order to outline a plate of food regulate front of you. 01:21:10 --> 01:21:49 May Allah subhanho wa Taala grant us all thanks. And may He make punishment from those who can get the drift everything that is done ask for us are sallallahu wasallam mechanized Allah and Amina Mohammed in some way Lima handys of Hanukkah Lomo behind the Ganesha to God Allah in London so we're going to be like, Yo Allah we ask you manage have mercy on us Yama Yama, have mercy on cautious Allah, Allah we ask order around to open the doors get through mercy for us, Allah condone us Allah, forgive our shortcomings we are human beings Yama, we have a human hue Allah we, we make mistakes Allah, Allah forgive us.

Bold a steadfastness keep us stop from shavon and keep shavon away from us Allah, God grant us good 01:21:49 --> 01:22:12 healthy Allah. Allah give us good health, Allah, God those who are sick turf Ill in any way need an anthem Curie Allah those who have passed away Own mercy on me Allah, God make us exemplary parents.

Yea, Allah. May Allah improve map out relations Yeah, Allah make become old exemplary parents and yeah, God protect our children Allah. God grant us all forms senior goodness Yama. 01:22:13 --> 01:22:27 Yama, we ask you every the goodness that Muhammad Sallallahu Sallam has asked, and miracle seek protection from all authority evil he has sought assign from, until mastan Allah, God, Allah Allah Allah, Allah, God, Allah, Allah, Allah, Allah Subhana decarbonisation that a milestone, insignificant Salama